Thursday, August 1, 2013

you are

My five-year-old granddaughter sleeps with me tonight and she can't lay still.  Earlier she played in the bath and hid behind my rose silk shower curtain and said, grandma can you see me?  No, cannot and I know she is washing those Barbies with my expensive Kiel's shampoos and that's all right.

We lie together and her body dips and dives, like a baby seal she undulates and presses herself against me.  I pull her towards me, kiss her damp brow and feathery hair and she releases.

 Her heaviness next to me reminds me of another girl some thirty-plus years ago.  She had uneven bangs thanks to my amateur efforts and the softest hazel-green eyes, luminous and startling.  She still shivers in my old lady dreams, always a young girl, never aging.  My Carrie never wrestled with demons, her dreams went uninterrupted, angels would visit and nestle next to her. She slept without effort, not like her daughter, not like her mother.

I want to hover over this grandchild and convince her she is the only one and Carrie, you are.



1 comment:

Arizaphale said...

Well, that finished me. I crave the day I have a grandchild nestled next to me and my 18 year old is still a toddler in my dreams. I wake in anguish when I realise that toddler has gone.