he says he can, you know

I am shredding the cooked chuck roast and tossing it into the crock pot, gristle and gooey stuff coating my fingers. I hate this, I mutter to myself and I am one step closer to a vegetarian life style. Oh wait, a life without bratwurst? Scrap that idea. Totally disgusted with these animal parts I wrap the remains of the carcass in newspaper and stuff it in my city compost bin. Somewhere this summer geraniums will bloom wildly and beautifully thanks to my defunct beef roast. My mother would have turned ashen and said, "I can't believe you're throwing that away," her Depression roots blaringly out there. I can only deal with animal flesh up to a certain point and then I need to spend time with a carrot.

My oldest son will be home in a few weeks and he is vegan. Much of our time will be spent chopping up stuff for the dinner table because chopped stuff equals healthy diet, think about it.  I eat and feel better when he is here, my cleansed body is light and buoyant, no nasty animal flesh weighing me down and my digestive track chock full of fiber practically hums as it does its job.  But ever so quietly I will steal out for a cheeseburger because the flesh can be weak and really hungry for protein other than almond paste.  God, please let him not smell this meat coming out of my pores. He says he can, you know.

 He and I are planning a trip in September to the United Kingdom for several weeks. My doctor has told me if Jason mentions the word hostel he should call him and Doc will explain why his 60-year-old mother should not be considering this as a nightly stopover. "Some of those kids haven't bathed in two or three weeks," says Doc. That would be my son I am silently thinking.  As I collect my paperwork to schedule my next appointment  he grabs it back and erases 30 minutes up in the corner and puts in 45. "I will need extra minutes to hear about your trip," he says.
Please Lord,  I silently pray, please let me have some really good stories to impress my MD.  If not, I just may have to stay in one of those hostels.

I said I wanted the bed by the window.